SOMETIMES I THINK...

Have you wondered if anyone would notice if you died?

Have you wondered if anyone would care if you died?

...I have

North Korea

This past week was the attack between North Korea and South Korea. I remember the morning, I went to my parents room to sleep a little more and the news was saying something about "North Korea attacks South Korea" on TV. Since I was half asleep, I didn't realize what was happening to my mother country.

I guess South and North Korea never got along. Technically, the korean war didn't end. It's sad to know that two brotherhood countries cannot share the same love Canada and US has. I never really knew how North Korea got so excluded from the world. Even before the Korean War, they were not very interactive.

When some people say, "Oh my gosh, North Korea is such a bad country!" they sometimes don't realize that it's not the citizens fault but the government. We can only imagine what the people of North Korea go through everyday. They get abused, mistreated, starved, etc. They have no choice like we have. For them it's not a "I'll do ______" but instead, someone goes "YOU HAVE TO_____". They have no say. They were so excluded from the outside World that during this years 2010 World Cup, they thought their team won all the games. They thought North Korea won the World Cup.

My pastor from church visits North Korea often. I heard many stories from church about the life there. Also, I watched a movie with my Dad about a boy trying to escape North Korea. He went through a lot of barriers such as getting caught trying to escape, running over barbed wires, crossing the river (where there are government officials trying to kill anyone escaping), etc. In one of the scenes it was where the boy got caught trying to escape and he was sent to prison camp. There were a variety of people from little kids, to pregnant women to grandparents. During one particular part, a pregnant woman was not doing the job probably and a soldier yelled at her and punched her in the stomach. This was one of many scenes that was very disturbing. I asked my dad "Is this how it is like to live in North Korea?" and he said that it is way way worse.

For them, they only dream about having a free life. For us, we take advantage of what we have. For those north koreans, it is their dream to have our lives.

Right now, many countries are hoping that China will influence North Korea's actions. My parents told me while eating dinner that North Korea is almost done preparing for their 2nd attack. If this becomes war, my family will be trapped in the war zone. I pray and I hope you guys as well, that nothing will happen to South Korea.

Personally, I think the war will not happen because the other countries will not allow it. But I read an article that it will be unlikely for Canada to send troops to South Korea. ( :( sniff sniff) It won't really matter because there will not be a war.

Kim Jong Il has caused a lot of pain and suffering to his people. I hope his youngest son will be a better leader. Even though Kim Jong Il is causing all this chaos to show the world the power that his son will bring, but it's just making everything worse. The countries are turning away from them. The effort that the countries are doing to make a friendship with North Korea is slowly deteriorating.

I hope this will be over soon.

Split second

To know the value of ten years:
Ask a newly Divorced couple.

To know the value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To know the value of one year:
Ask a student who Has failed a final exam.

To know the value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.

To know the value of one month:
Ask a mother who has given birth to A premature baby.

To know the value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To know the value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to Meet.

To know the value of one minute:
Ask a person Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To know the value of one-second:
Ask a person Who has survived an accident.

To know the value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics

Time waits for no one.

Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when you can share it with someone special. – Author unknown.

I remember I read this somewhere in elementary school, and it was a pretty deep poem. :)

Today while we were on our way to waterloo to drop my brother off, I saw an accident happen. Well, not like HAPPEN HAPPEN, but we passed by the accident that happened like 2 seconds ago. One car was like, FLIPPED OVER, and it was crushed into half its size. There were cars stopping and people were getting out to help the victims. I saw people calling 911, and it was pretty scary.

I thought about if they would live. There could have only been one person in the car, or a family with a new born. They could have been listening to the radio as the enjoy their sunday afternoon. And a millisecond later, they are upside down as the car rolls. I remember my first car accident last year around this time. It was snowing really hard, and the accident only lasted a couple of seconds. The car was spinning around the highway. All I remembered was me staring outside the window and my mom screaming. I didn't even have time to realize that I was in the middle of an accident. When it was over, I was like like..."w t f?" My brain shut down for a couple of minutes until my dad said "ARE YOU OKAYY?!" Thankfully we were all okay and there wasn't a big damage to the car.

I just hope that the people that were in the car are all okay and hope God is with them. It just takes a second for our lives to be taken, and I was reminded to enjoy life because you never know when it will be over.

SHORT TERM GOAL

My goal is to get my G1, and drive to H-Mart with my G1less brother in the back seat. I want to go to the gas station and pump gas into my car while my brother waits. I want to stick my tongue out at him as he watches me.

current mood

It's sad knowing that your friendship might mean more to you than your friend.

Childhood

• waiting for my parents to tuck me into bed
• helping my mom cook
• collecting stickers
• buying my first beyblade
• drawing anime pictures
• sleeping past bedtime
• waiting for my parents to come home from parent-teacher night asking "WHAT DID THEY SAY?!"
• staying home alone with my brother
• long car rides
• going to Disney Land and not riding anything because all of us are scared of rides
• Finishing my first McDonad's kid meals hamburger
• Learning how to knit from my grandma
• My brother turning the shower water hot because I didn't know how to
• Getting my first cell phone
• Getting christmas presents from sunday school teacher
• Waiting for mom and dad to come home from work
• For monday to come faster so I can go to school
• Not being tired when waking up at 8 o'clock
• TreeHouse TV
• new episode of arthur
• Dad carrying me up to bed if I fell asleep on the couch
• Dad giving me all these kisses on the cheeks
• Going to hallelujah night at church duing Halloween
• Bringing my projects from school and showing it to my parents for getting an A+
• School musicals on holidays
• Getting away with bullying my brother
• Using straws to drink water or milk
• Sibling's handy-downs

Strangers

"Fear makes strangers of people who would be friends." -Shirley MacLaine

Like any normal thursday, I was on my way to my after school chemistry class by taking the subway. But as I was going closer to the ticket machine, I saw a man around his 40s/50s asking people for money. Following my parent's rule of "don't talk to strangers," I tried to avoid him...with a $10 bill in my hand. While I was buying my tokens, he showed up beside me. "Can I have a token?" said the stranger opening his hand out. In his hand were a bunch of nickels, dimes, and pennies. He had around 50 cents, $2.50 off. I wanted to get away from him so I started to say a bunch of things that didn't even make sense to me. "Sorry, I don't have change," or "No, no, no" and ran off with 3 extra tokens in hand.

When I got into the subway, I started thinking what I just did. I started asking questions like, "How will he get home?" "What about his family?" or "I wonder what happened to him?" I was regretting not giving him the token. I couldn't sacrifice my ice cappuccino (that I later had) for that token.

Everyday, as we go on with our daily lives, we pass by hundreds of strangers. When we see someone that's not the "average" or "normal" human being, we try to avoid them. We have our own personal bubble we protect 24/7. Let me ask you guys this: If there was only 1 seat left between two strangers in a subway or bus, would you go seat there or just stand? Whenever we pass by someone, he or she could've been our future best friend, co-worker, boyfriend/girlfriend, and more. Instead we just go on with our daily lives. The person we might be standing next to in a public place could be going through a heart break, depression, money problems or a disease. Yet we don't know because we hide ourselves behind fear. Fear of coming out of our safety net.

Now I'm not saying that we should all go talk to every random stranger we meet in public. But when someone asks us something, we should give them a nice response with a warm smile unlike that "wtf why are you talking to me" look. Smile because you might make another stranger's day a little brighter.

My Sugar Baby - Liam

So for the past week starting from Friday October 29th, I had to carry a fake baby around where ever I went. It wasn't those mechanical babies that cried, but it was just a boring old bag of sugar decorated with pantyhose and baby clothing.

Ever since I was little, it was one of my "things to do before I die" kinda thing. I would always see people in movies and dramas carrying around these fake babies. I thought it would be so FUN!

I was wrong.

I think the best part was making the baby. So our teacher, Mrs.Stableford told us to buy a list of things so we can make our sugar babies such as: Pantyhose, bag of sugar, eyes, pacifier, baby clothes, pillow stuffings, etc. We expected her to tell the class how to make the baby. Do a step by step process...When class started she said "Okay GUYS!..START MAKING YOUR BABIES!" We had no clue how to make it so we spent half the period just figuring out how to make it. Eventually we found a way, and I made my baby boy LIAM!

Here are some things I learned while carrying Liam around everywhere for the past week:

1) BABIES ARE HEAVY.

So Liam only weighed around 7 pounds? At first I thought to myself "oh, this isn't so heavy," but after carrying him around everywhere for a couple of minutes, my arms was in pain! Omgosh. Also I couldn't go to my locker because one arm was occupied with Liam so I couldn't put my binders in my bag or wear my jacket.

2) Help from Family and Friends are a MUST!

When I needed to go to my locker or the washroom, my friends had to take care of him. When I didn't wanna take care of Liam, my friends took him. At one point, I left my baby in one of my classes not even remembering I had a child with me. When I got to my next class, I remembered that I had a son! I ran back to one of my classmates class, and he told me that the guy next door had him. I ran into his class and grabbed Liam. Thank God they had my back because if I lost it, 15% of my mark gone right there.

3) Strangers are really scary! LAWWL :)

So 2 out of the 7 days, I had to take Liam to my tutor school. I had to bring him to the viva bus and ttc subway. In the subway, I got the WORST glares from people, especially old ladies. At one point I said to them, "It's a fake baby." This woman was staring at my baby so hard I thought lasers were going to come out of her eyes or something. Gosh, I was so embarrassed. First I look like a 10 year old. Second I'm carrying around a baby. Third, it's fake. Yup, I'm a typical 16 year old.

4) Some people have to keep their personal opinions about my baby to themselves.

"WHY IS IT BROWN?" "IT'S SO UGLY!" -PUNCHH- Yup, those were some of the comments or reactions I got from many classmates (especially boys.) As time passed by, I started to attack back naturally without me even realizing. "You're baby is kinda ugly." ...

"Well, you're pretty ugly too." It kinda pisses you off when some people don't consider what you're going through. I learned how real parents feel when random strangers criticize a new born. Also, if their kids have mental or physical illnesses, I'm pretty sure there will be those people that will make fun of the parents. Those kinds of people actually deserve a punch in the face.

5) Support from your family affects how you view your baby.

My dad thought this project was USLESS. He said how Liam looked like some kind of demon child. He wasn't considering the fact that I made Liam and he was worth a huge chunk of my mark. Every time he said some rude comment, it was influencing my views on Liam. While I was hearing all these stories from my classmates stating that their parents bought extra clothes for their grandchild or whatever, my dad was yelling at me about Liam. On sunday, I couldn't even bring Liam to church because he didn't wanna be known as the "parents of a child who is carrying around a demon child." He was not giving me an legitimate reason as to why I couldn't bring him to church. I knew for a fact that people would've liked Liam at church. :(

6) Parenting is hard.

I've only had Liam for only 7 days. He wasn't even real but brought so many problems to my life. My arms were getting tired, random strangers giving me all these stares, etc. It opened my eyes to the real lives of parents. My mom told me the moment I brought Liam home, "I hope you will realize what I went through." Being a parent is HARD WORK. It's stressful, time consuming, and an emotional roller coaster. We all say, "yeah parenting is hard...blah blah blah." but if you guys do this project, you will actually get a glimpse of what it is like to be one. I am not ready to be a parent, and I won't be for another good 10 years.

When this project started, a lot of classmates came up to me and asked me, "this project is useless." "I don't get why you're taking this course." and a million more questions. I like these kinds of courses cause these kind of lessons help me in the real world and in the future. Even though I was happy to hand in Liam to my teacher, I will miss seeing his droopy eyes and his extra-fat thighs.

hmm...

Lets all HIBERNATE.